Have you ever been by the beach with friends, some of whom you’ve not seen for 12 months as they’re visiting from abroad, and had to excuse yourself for a ‘pointless meeting’, then sat in the car with your smartphone propped up - and waited for the other attendee, only for them never to show up? Then returned sheepishly with the nagging feeling you’ll never get that 20 minutes back, and when you’re on your deathbed - surrounded by your loved ones - it will literally be the only thing you can think about. The only thing.
Neither have I!
End of post.
JOKES!!!
Ok, so obviously I have.
And it was all my own doing because I decided to create pointlessmeeting.com
It’s a real website where people can book pointless meetings.
I made flyers and everything…
The meetings are all with me. They're free as standard. A premium option is £300, which is identical except I wear a hat.
It launched last year, but there were 2 painful teething issues:
Firstly, I didn’t properly sync my calendar. So when I posted it to Reddit and it got a load of interest, suddenly I had a week of back-to-back pointless meetings.
I managed to juggle things so I wouldn’t have to reschedule people. After all, that would be a crud first impression. My internal rule: if someone books a meeting, I’ll honour it.
Secondly, I failed to make it clear on the website that there was another human on the other end (ME!). People expected some sorta AI avatar or for it to just not work.
So of all the meetings that were booked, including the one at the beach - approximately 100% of them were no-shows.
To be clear:
I made a website called pointlessmeeting.com
It takes the piss outta management culture, does something around connection, (feel free to insert other arty justifications).
Basically, it’s a fun project.
So I’d say it isn’t actually pointless.
BUT THEN nobody turned up.
So it was absolutely pointless.
That is high-grade sarcasm from god [slow clap]
I slow clapped god, how cliché. And yeah - he’s meddling with this (of all the things!).
After realising the above, I made it clear there’s a human on the other end. Now it works. We chat for 20 minutes then hang up with minimal chance of ever seeing each other again.
It’s like chat-roulette, but all convos are with me. That’s kinda worryingly insane actually. What have I built?! WHY have I built it?! I do have friends - promise.
Book yours: pointlessmeeting.com
hello again bottom readers of my posts. Do you also stay for film’s post-credit scenes too? I wonder what the best post-credit scene is of all time? My vote: Wayne's World.
So here’s an update on my friend David I met in Pret. He said he was working on an EP and guess what - I saw him the other day and it’s been released. Here’s the lead song. Enjoy: